| :o |
[Oct. 30th, 2009|07:55 am] |
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I've suddenly found myself baking and cleaning and doing big-boy tasks. I guess in the absence of my parents I DO somehow know how to be a responsible adult. XD |
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| Alcohol makes it better! |
[Oct. 27th, 2009|06:15 pm] |
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Got borderlands; is fun! Had a cry yesterday and felt much better afterward. Just needed to release all the pressure that had been building inside. Today I am celebrating the night with an abundance of booze and video games. Huzzah! |
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| :D |
[Oct. 19th, 2009|09:17 pm] |
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Hit my seven month with kyle today. It's amazing how much we've both grown. <3 my man. :3 |
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| :o |
[Sep. 6th, 2009|09:53 am] |
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Will Wright came into the sbux i was working at yesterday. He gets a tall mocha frapucinno no whip. :D |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 16th, 2009|11:09 am] |
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5 shots of 90 proof vodka owned my soul. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 30th, 2009|09:22 am] |
Written on a piece of scratch paper, a proper representation of the emotions running through my mind. To be picked up and used, abused and tossed away. I know they still appreciate me; I know he still loves me, but my mind can't help but ask why. What reasoning is there for my to be on the recieving end of positivity? I'm not worth it! There are no redeeming qualities to my persona and being. I know this is a past emotional wave finally making it to shore, pushed along by the gravity of my self-defeating tendencies. I'm just tried of feeling like all I'm good for is other people's pleasure and happiness. Can I cash in some positive karma points? That's a lie; the boy goes out of his way to make me happy. That's why upsetting him hurt me so bad, and even though we're adults and talking it out I still have this lingering sense off self-doubt and destruction. Getting my thoughts on paper always helps; even if it's virtual. This is still the happiest I think I've been in my entire life, which is probably why fucking up really really hurts right now. I thought I was over being a failure then it comes back and kicks me in the face to remind me who and what I really am. Wow, that's fairly dramatic. Just seeing my thoughts visually helps mee validate how rediculous they actually are. This isn't something I would probably post for public display; but every now and again I think everyone gets a little curious on how everyone else's mental process works, so up it goes!
I love you all, and appreciate you all. Life is beautiful, no matter what yourself or others may say. :) |
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| Flickr update! |
[Apr. 8th, 2009|07:43 am] |
Now featuring more happy and cute boys.
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| Car better! |
[Mar. 6th, 2009|01:41 pm] |
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And there was much rejoicing. |
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| :3 |
[Feb. 2nd, 2009|10:51 pm] |
The older I get the more I notice that there's a difference between taking advice and internalizing it properly against doing and agreeing with anything someone says. So many worldviews, so many personalities, and what I have to maintain is to be my own person.
I'm kind of flirt-crazy lately.
My capacity for for stress has become rather high in the sense of how well I can manage a full plate without having any sort of mental freak-out.
I don't think I'm necesariley attracted, sexually, to the hyper-thin guys I meet rather then my mind still wants to idealize them and see myself like that. I realize that I have an extremely skewed perception of myself and my own body image. All I can try to be certain of is how I physically and emotionally feel, not look, and right now I'm feeling pretty good! I'm happy that I'm going in to the nutritional field; it makes it a lot harder for me to fall back in to unhealthy dietary habits on both extremes.
Randomness end! |
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| Rar! |
[Dec. 31st, 2008|11:20 pm] |
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My cider needs less hard and more cider. Tastes like weak beer. |
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| Busybusybusy. |
[Nov. 29th, 2008|11:47 pm] |
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It's weird how I thrive under times of pressure. My work has been crazy with short-staffings and people getting sick/being hospitalized, but it hasn't been bad by any means. I really and truly don't mind working; It's a way for me to focus my energies in a positive outlet. People say I look tired, which may be true, but at least I'm happy and as long as my body keeps up that's what matters. :D |
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| In other news. |
[Nov. 9th, 2008|06:34 pm] |
I've gotten sick of meat and have gone vegeterian.
Yay veggies! |
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| Fantastic! |
[Nov. 5th, 2008|03:25 am] |
Looks like I'm well on my way to being officially recognized as a lesser citizen in the state of California simply because I have zero sexual attraction to vaginas.
GG california. |
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| So long... |
[Oct. 12th, 2008|06:45 pm] |
Starbucks #5768 Geary and Camino Verde.
... WAH.
Who am I kidding, I'm still 5 minutes away, and now I can give them a hard time without having to work with them on a regular basis!
>:D
I wonder how my first day will be tomorrow... *ponder ponder* |
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| :O |
[Sep. 30th, 2008|12:38 pm] |
I can, indeed, has a promotion.
Next week is my last week at my current store.
... it kinda hasn't really sunk in, I'm full of nervous excitement. |
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| :D |
[Sep. 29th, 2008|11:24 pm] |
I made some vegan pumpkin-flax madelines, and they are delicious.
I've also been up since midnight yesterday.
I think it's time for sleep.
I think I'm starting to get used to meat/dairy substitutes... I think I actually like the taste of veggie products more anyways now. XD
Now to just learn how to cook more then pastries, regardless of deiliciousness.
That can be for another night though because I'm typing in lines for no reason then the fact that my brain is seemingly stopping function.
Sleep get now woo! Tomorrow will be a grand day full of new music and new wow patches.
Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
And work, which is also yay because i might be getting promotoed/moved very soon.
... oksleepbai. |
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jas777's journal
